LIKE MY SHOE PLEASE!!!!!

If I could have a small stab at this, who knows what craziness I could expel onto the universe?

http://www.vincecamutoshoedesigncontest.com/Entry/d719854a627b450f_b24efd43f5e2f63a

LOOKS I LOVE..Zac Posen-in the whole

     Though I am unsure as to which type of creature I feel that Posen's jackets and dresses best represent, I fel that it is something close to a...bug. Well, not the bug itself, but more of its exoskeleton...and I absolutely LOVE it! Yes, I am a bit odd to make a comparison such as this, but as I am also one to make many comparisons, especially when linking people and things to animals, that are quite abnormal in general. 

      The one thing I have fallen head over heels for in this collection is the way Posen uses LINES and varied CUTS to give off a sharp edge and quirky/funky vibe to satisfy individuals such as me who crave fashion that takes roots from the dark side (OK, I do sometimes like a little fluff). The crazy "seamage" of his jackets and dresses makes me want to run rampant while screaming until I can find another individual who I can blab to about such a feat. The intricacy and slight excessiveness the lines in each piece is EXACTLY how I would do it-nothing less, of course. I love playing with shapes within shapes to accentuate the natural curvature of the female body. Strong shoulders and a punching waistline are absolutely essential to create an ensemble that empowers a woman. 

     Alongside the exoskeleton-like clothing shown in this beautiful collection, another feature I eyeballed while browsing through this collection was the pairing of a three-quarter-length pant with a full sized jacket. I love Posen's new take on the dress pant and how it plays on the irony of how a too short pant usually looks ridiculous, but of course not in this case. Who knows, maybe super-designed socks will step into the spotlight with this new sock-exposing-length pant?

     BLUE. If you didn't notice it, I sure did! Posen did a wonderful job of showcasing blue in its many shades, especially with the rich, electrifyingly saturated fabrics used in his pants. The indigo dress hits a high note for me and adds some unexpected color to a usually dull fall palette. 

     Willing to try mixing blues? Maybe a super-detailed leather jacket? Exercise your right to wear leather loveliness and bright colors when it's dull outside and slap on a pair of blue slacks. Layer on an indigo sweater with a cream scarf. Maybe even with a deep navy pair of gloves. You will look...awesome. :)

LOOKS LIKE...I've got an uncanny obsession with BANANA YELLOW

     Breaking news: a banana has been spotted prancing around the local streets recently-oh WAIT...that's just a girl sporting some incredibly breathtakingly banana-colored skinnies! I found these lovelies on urbanoutfitters.com and absolutely cannot get enough of them! A pop of yellow with everything seems to be the rule I am sticking to lately (well, it isn't a formal rule, but it's my rule!). These skinnies can go with everything from an edgy blazer to a floral top with wedges, flats, combat boots, pumps, or even Vans! I love to contrast bright colors against greys and blacks alongside layering on some chainy necklaces or a studded belt. For an easy outfit idea, try wearing these with an oversized white t-shirt tucked in paired with a black jeweled statement necklace and some nude flats (or any neutral colored flats!). 

     Warning: be sure not to wear any more yellow if you choose to wear pants such as these. People will mistake you for the fruit after which these pants are colored. You also may end up being chased by a large gorilla of sorts. It could happen. Watch out. 

LOOKS LIKE...Jeremy Scott has rendered me unable to draft a witty title in the short amount of space I have that would properly encompass all of the oddities of his most recent collection

     Where shall I begin with this one? Wonderful idea-I'll turn Jeremy Scott's Fall 2011 fashion show into a fun little...story time session that will answer all of the questions that may have popped into your noggin as you proceeded to view this collection. Honestly, how could I possibly be expected to have chosen just a few looks from such a collection? Well...I didn't...enjoy!
     Let's set the scene for this "story" in the middle of New York City. If any city would own up to the events I will proceed to describe, it would be exactly this one. Here we go...
     One ordinary day in the city, a very furious four year old decided to dye her hair pink in response to her mother refusing to provide her with regular clothing and proceeded to parade around in a discarded Coke bottle wrapping while carrying the Elmo costume from Halloween with her for added warmth. This little girl, let's name her Peggy (no apparent reasoning), found a buddy on the side of the street and asked to borrow her rain coat that was soon discovered to have been previously owned by a full time clown from the local circus. Apparently, this rain coat was not exactly floating her boat and little Peggy decided she would need to steal her father's hand made bomber jacket. By this time, the rain had washed out her pink hair color and turned it into a shade of puke green. From the corner of her eye, Peggy sees her mother and, in an attempt to escape, trips into a puddle and is left with soaking wet clothing. Lucky for her, the newest members of the local alien tribe had just arrived and were around the corner. Peggy was able to borrow a pair of antennas an a space cadet dress to continue on with her day. While making her way to the local candy shop, Peggy spotted a cute space man wearing the hot pink boots she had been vying for since January. "Well, I guess they are rather unisex," said little Peggy in response to seeing the space man she admired from afar wearing her pink boots. Not to fret, why would Peggy want those ratty old boots when she could sling some pink fur pumps onto her tootsies? She tapped on the shoulder of another immigrant alien and asked to borrow them alongside her snazzy new raincoat that was clearly not too exposing for the streets of NYC (jokes). Just as Peggy did not think her day could get much better, Ernie from Sesame Street was parading through the streets of NYC and bumped into her with his orange complexion gleaming from his recent spray tan. How could anything better happen? Perhaps Pippi Longstocking encased fully in one of her striped socks could pump this day up even more. She soon discovered that Miss Longstocking had married Ernie and would live happily ever orange...I mean after (seriously, look at her eye shadow!). Oh joy, the best has yet to come! Leaving from a local Scottish bar was a rather flamboyant individual strutting down the streets wearing a quite unusual version of a kilt. I'm sure he was perfectly thrilled to be sporting a furry black sweater atop this hot pink skirt (what man wouldn't be?). After little Peggy brought all her new friends to enjoy a bit of ice cream on this fine day, she stopped short. Who was this woman? She had the perfect outfit to match her fuzzy new shoes! What luck! So, Peggy and the lady wearing a pink, fuzzy, foreign animal of sorts around her shoulders trotted down the road. Disaster has struck! All of the creatures Peggy made friends with turned out to be evil! No worries-Superwoman is here to save the day...
     No number of warnings can sufficiently deal out the amount of "no's" I would give to anyone even considering one of these looks. Though Jeremy Scott may be some sort of whimsical genius, no individual in his or her right mind would prance casually down any street in any of the above looks. Superwoman will NOT be there to save the day, so in summation, don't forget your raincoat when you run away from mommy and don't take any pink, furry slippers from strangers-they will all eat you in the end. And, goodnight to the children who have read this...sweet nightmares from Jeremy Scott's Fall 2011 collection :).

    
    

LOOKS I LOVE...COLOR LIKE NONE OTHER

     Upon seeing this collection of rich colors that I would touch frogs and lizards to be able to own, I began to drool slightly from one side of my mouth (KIDDING). But honestly, if I was going to drool over anything (and I cannot stand saliva) it would be on all of THIS. Gucci's Fall 2011 collection has left me in a state of absolute awe. My jaw has already fallen to the ground and is staying there for awhile.
     The collection began with a luxuriously colored teal feathered coat and slowly begins to incorporate flowing, piecey dresses with many a slit up to there. Gucci took usually neutral colored furs and matched them to make them equally as drool-worthy as the other color saturated pieces. The combination of deep mustards with gray and shades of purple brightened up the fall palette. Last season, everything fall was black, black, and black. Though I absolutely loved all of it, somebody needed to take us up to the crazily colored heavens for a fresh, new season!
     Let's discuss the dresses in this collection for a bit. Yes, I do realize they may not be practical to wear to formal events that many would normally wear a "fuller coverage" dress to, but if given the opportunity to sport flowers or fur on a dress that billows so beautifully in wind or in air conditioning, I would recommend doing so. They all bring emphasis to the waistline and are made in a fabric that is flattering on any mammal in the book (yes, I do believe elephants would look nice in these ensembles). Of the dresses, my favorite is the last one-the combination of goldenrod and black makes me MELT (then again, any saturated shades make me sigh wishfully). I even like the polka dotted dresses. Polka dots in 98% of forms are a no-no for me, but in this case, how could I help myself?
     And those coats! Who said blacks and greys had to be just that? Why not throw some gorgeously dyed feathers, crazily colored furs, and tantalizing textures into the mix? Pairing colors of similar families in the same ensemble is a trend that I am absolutely loving. Each color plays the other one up and gives the wearer a multidimensional POP. Even us regulars can try this out! I did it just the other day with some red cigarette pants and a purple top! Though I received a few odd stares from those unfamiliar with the idea that yes, this is an acceptable concept to be trying out in public, I felt incredible dripping in color as I walked to class alongside a sea of students who just rolled out of bed (attractive).
     Try some crazy combos like Gucci did this season! No matter how odd you may feel initially, you will always look better than the guy wearing a raggedy t shirt and improperly fitting jeans next to you :)

LOOKS LIKE...YSL was feelin' a little bit hairy back in 2010

     I stalked. As I was stalking past YSL collections in my overwhelming amount of spare time, I came across this: a shoe mohawk. Though I've seen many a mohawk on oddball individuals, I can't quite say I've spotted one on the runway, let alone sprouting from the back of a cobalt blue pump. I wonder if the intent was to make it look as though the model was in hyper speed and was sprinting down the runway. Maybe the hairstylist was upset and decided to quit last minute, so of course an adequate substitute in the form of shoe hair had to be employed. Yes, I do love the fierce color of this pump and would pair it with any dress on any day, but I might consider shaving it first. 

     Are you a fan of such a furry shoe? Try wearing a pair of these on a date and play footsies across the table. You may frighten your company as he wonders how many months it has been since your last shave. Maybe the extra layer of hair will keep you warmer during cold months...or not. Either way, as much as I love YSL and the Fall 2010 collection I found this shoe in, I'm going to go ahead and say PASS on this lovely little number :).

WE WANT WEDGES

     THEY'RE EVERYWHERE. Wedges are as in as chocolate is in my mouth and are easy to wear, incredibly gorgeous to look at, and fun to flaunt! Afraid of wearing platform pumps that will teeter your tower? Check out these for an update. Maybe it isn't worth it to topple over on a big night out. The exciting part about wedges is that they can be worn with...ANYTHING. Short, skirts, flowy pants, skinny jeans, club attire, no attire (kidding), and everything else you could imagine are possibilities included in this deal!
     Another variation of the wedge is the super-chunky wedge/heel which is a mix among a clog, wedge, and regular heel that allows you to stroll down the street without strain. If a strange man happens to whistle at you while you pass by in these babies, you will be able to retaliate in two ways while wearing these shoes: 1) run away swiftly because such shoes make this possible or 2) batter his head with your sufficiently equipped feet-believe in these babies!
     Try out this trend anytime and feel free to 70's it up all the way! Warning: make sure you scuff up the bottoms of your wedges and practice waddling in them before struttin' down the street-you will go flying at an exponentially higher rate while wearing wedges than if you were to wear other shoes. This statement is based on personal experience :).